Back to the issue itself. Lots of laughable stuff in there, as usual, but a piece entitled, "The American Runner, 2006", practically had me rolling around on the floor. It might not have the same effect on you, but for $4.50, you can find out "who you are, what makes you run, and why you like Chariots of Fire." What an eye-opener! For instance, I never knew that...
* There's a 49% chance I'm running with a water bottle on my person at all times, a 43% chance I've got my MP3 player with me for the 50% of the time I spend running on busy roads, a 25% probability that I'm carrying a GPS unit with me so I don't get lost on the treadmill I happen to run on 5% of the time, but only a 17% chance I'm carrying my cell phone so that I can call someone with the completely valid excuse that my wife is ovulating, thus preventing me from actually getting my run in.
* Each year, I buy only 3 pairs of running shoes because there's a 31% likelihood I'm running 4 days a week at an average of 9-9:59 per mile.
* The thoughts "latte, latte, latte" and "slow is smooth, smooth is fast" are the key mantras missing from my motivational strategy to help get me through a tough workout.
* Eminem's "Lose Yourself" and the Black Eyed Peas "Pump It" should be two of the songs I definitely have programmed into my MP3 player when I'm blazing a trail for 16% of my 20-29 miles per week.
* Pre barely edged out my dad and Jesus as people I'd most like to run with. And good 'ol George Dubya is a more desirable running partner than either Lance Armstrong or Will Farrell. Did they conduct this poll in Florida? I demand a recount.
* 59% of the time I'd rather get laid than go for a run. Actually, I can't argue with that.
That'll do it for this entry. If the numbers are accurate, there's a 2% chance I'm meditating before I head out for my run. It's 7% more likely, however, that I'm searching for my Fuel Belt. "You won't miss me anyway", however, according to the No. 2 excuse used when certain obligations threaten to keep me from a run. Take it easy.
Quote of the day:
Don't allow injuries or other setbacks to derail your faith in your ultimate goals. Everyone goes through hard times.
- Kara Goucher giving arguably the most useful piece of advice in the aforementioned issue of Runner's World
4 comments:
dear lord that was a pretty amazing post! I have gotta go pick myself up a copy of RW! :) ...anyways glad to see the blog updated, thanks for the great chat yesterday! Can't wait for xmas to tear up the streets of auburn & discuss our comebacks :) Catch ya later mario!
love gwyth
There is a 0% chance I will read the copy or RW you have referenced. (Although, I'm anxious (yet apprehensive) to see this picture of Deena I keep reading about.)
Nice post, Mario. I've been lurking for a while. Always appreciate the humor.
Good to see you running again as well. I ended up injured around the same time as you, and it was motivational to see you hit the bike so hard.
This is Column-worthy. Seriously. Good stuff.
Post a Comment